Why the world does not need superman (fan fiction role playing!)

Started by bearded, February 09, 2009, 10:08:56 AM

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Grand Al

Quote from: thalaw2 on March 30, 2009, 03:31:38 AM
I've had enough of this silly exchange.  As far as I'm concerned the only one not working for a world without Superman is the boyscout himself.  I bust my hump every night because I believe that one day the world will not need me.  That one day a young boy can go to the movies with his parents in the evening and return home without the threat that anything one would ever seek to harm them. 

On the other hand Kal-El is an alien from another planet who tries to earn his spot among humanity by "protecting it".  If it didn't need protecting he would be out of a job and the only one who doesn't want that is Kal-El himself.  He knows that the day he hangs up his cape and tights is the day he may have to look for another planet and he's afraid of it.

Lex Luthor, don't ever come to Gotham or I'll do what Kal-El hasn't done...put you out of business permanently and in a nice padded cell for the rest of your life!

Batman

Wah wah wah. Let it go about the zorro and your parents, Brucie. Nobody cares anymore. Why don't you go polish that giant phallic car of yours, rich-boy.

And who the heck is Defensor? Wait, are you a transformer? Awesome, I love your movie!



H

thalaw2

To whom it may concern:

Lex is right.  Superman is committing a major faux pas against humanity.  The man does not know how to dress.  Every time he goes in to action just looking at him is a complete eye sore.  He has no fashion sense at all. 

If it was left up to me to redesign or re-imagine the man of steel's costume I would make it more environmentally friendly.  A greener Superman, if you see what I mean.  If Superman really wants to be part of humanity then he needs to join the green initiative.  Starting with that cape.  Lose it.  He doesn't need it to fly and it obstructs the view of his....back.  Then there is that hideous blue shirt.  Lost that too.  He's invulnerable so he doesn't need it.  If he really must have that "S" then he can get a tattoo.  Now on to the tights.  He can lose those too, but just the leggings...gotta leave something to the imagination.  Lets see what are we left with.  Speedos and red boots.  Oh Purrrrrrrrrrr!    Now that's a Superman!   

I think I need a cold shower. 

Selina

P.S.  Don't get mad Bruce.  You had your chance.
革命不会被电视转播

docdelorean88

In the event of a debate of super ethics, i have been programmed to respond with the following:

"It seems to me that the world has only given attention to the superheroes who have there own cities to protect. I think it's time the little guy got some attention, and maybe be rewarded for his services in the process. I'm not saying give me a giant Ed McMann(R.I.P.) sized check, but would a televesion show, a series of action figures or a national holiday kill anyone. No. Heck, I'd even settle for a Booster Gold Parade in Central City. But, no. No one ever shows appreciation to Booster Gold. I mean, they don't even get my name right! If one more reporter calls me Green Lantern I'm gonna take my superpowered self back to the future...(5 second interval for audience reaction of shock/denial/grieving) I swear, I'll do it! All I'm saying is just because you sit at a round table overlooking the entire earth with 6 of your buddies, doesn't mean your above crowd controll. And while I'm at it, might i add how demanding crowd controll is. You have to stand there, then you have to say stop and go. I'm breakin a sweat just thinking about it. Next time the earth needs saving, just remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease my friend. The squeaky wheel."
Sincerely,
Skeets, On Behalf of Booster Gold.
"Roads, Where we're going we don't need... Roads"

AncientSpirit

Dear Perry White,

I don't normally write complaint letters to the editor but I find now that I must.   There has been a lot of talk by some about how much good Superman has done for this planet, and there has been a lot of talk by others of the planet-wide harm he has caused.  I can't speak to either, as I'm not one to follow politics much; I just like to hang out with my pals and gals at the local burger joint and talk about ... school things, ya know?

BUT ... for years I followed Superman's love life and tried to recreate for myself the whole love triangle thing.  Where he had Lois and Lana fighting over him, I had these two girls from my school who I am too much of a gentleman (or a coward) to name by name here.   For this conversation, I will simple refer to them as "B" and "V".   

To make a long story short, this year I followed Superman's lead and finally chose one over the other -- and now the whole world is crashing around my head.   People seem out of their minds that I went for the girl who had a little money in the bank, and whose father could put me into a nice, comfy job when I finish school.   (Let me tell you, my prospects - like my grades -- were NOT that great!

Jeepers!  I even chose the brunette -- just like he did!  It isn't fair!  He took no flack for his decision ... but now my friends are all calling ME the jughead!   Seems that Superman can do no wrong and is judged far differently than us mere mortal men.  So I have to agree with our former President, Lex Luther.  Superman IS a menace!

Your truly,
Archie Andrews
AncientSpirit
Plotter and Writer of ... The Legendary (and by that I mean LONG FORGOTTEN) Fantastic Force!!!!