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Paranoia: My Name is Troubleshooter

Started by BlueBard, June 12, 2007, 11:55:13 AM

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Viking

ArrMatee nods.  "We send the blocky thing ahead first."

BlueBard

"Good idea!" Spyd-R nods enthusiastically, getting his camera ready.

The Porta-Wall is okay at following you without a lot of extra commands, but isn't smart enough to execute complex instructions.  You'll have to issue simple voice commands to get it to move out ahead of you.

Viking

I presume that the Porta-Wall does not normally fill the entire hallway, and that we can get behind it.  ArrMatee can get behind it by commanding it to "Stop," and then walking behind it.

From there, he would simply call out orders to make it move, starting with "Forward."

However, if this instead makes the Porta-Wall approach ArrMatee, he will instead state "Stop," and then give the reverse instruction of "Back."

ArrMatee will likely follow the Porta-Wall at a distance of 15 feet, and everyone else can follow behind him.  That should allow him to continue giving instructions to the Porta-Wall, while having room to dodge if he needs it to be a wall suddenly.

Let me know if you need any further detailed instructions.

BlueBard

You have no real problem getting the Porta-Wall out in front of the team and moving forward.

The smoke is getting thicker.  Enough to irritate your eyes, noses and throats, but not incapacitating (yet).  There's a dim orange glow up ahead.

"Is this safe?" Elec-O asks.  "Can we go a different way?"

"Negative," the Toolbot replies.

Viking

ArrMatee calls out for the Porta-Wall to "Stop."

He then addresses the rest of the team.

"My guess is that there's a really big fire up that way, which is decidedly not safe.  Unfortunately, that also seems to be the only route to take.  Toolbot, do you know of the nearest source of water that doesn't require us to first face that fire?"

BlueBard

"Vell," the toolbot replies, "Un-vortunately my datastore does not contain ze schkematics for ze vater system.  But iff you vant to know vere to find a power re-zeptical, den I'm your bot!"

"I think we should send someone ahead to scout," Spyd-R says.  "Someone exp-- um, expert at uh, reconnaissance.  Too bad Spam-R's replacement isn't here."

"Not me!" Elec-O interjects.  "Reconnaissance is not part of my assignment!"

"Well, we can't send in the Toolbot or the Equipment Guy either," Spyd-R says.  "And the um, blocky thing isn't sentient or even voice equipped."  His eyes fall on Numb-R and Blo-R.  "Either of you two loyal Citizens care to volunteer your services for the good of the Complex?"

Viking

ArrMatee silently thanks his lucky stars that he has been deemed too important to send ahead on reconnaissance.  And he didn't even need to suggest someone else for the duty!

Publicly, he maintains a casually bland and neutral poker face when it comes to picking a volunteer.  That's the Team Leader's job!

BlueBard

"I'm no coward," says Blo-R decisively.  "I'll go."

Spyd-R is impressed.  "Very heroic and patriotic of you, Citizen!  I'll take your picture for the official record.  Smile!"  Spyd-R raises his camera.  "Hm.  Turn your head slightly left.  A little more.  No.  Turn your head to the right.  Okay, give me a heroic pose.  No, not like that.  How about a salute?  Keep your arm straight.  Don't bend your hand like that, it makes you look like a slacker.  Chin up.  Blah, blah, blah..."

Twenty minutes later, Spyd-R manages to take a picture he's happy with.  Blo-R moves down the hallway, his figure obscured by light smoke.  You hear him coughing.  Shortly he returns.

"Looks like a bombed out PLC warehouse," Blo-R says.  "There's a lot of smoke but only minor fires still burning.  We can get past it, no problem."

Viking

"Then I suggest we... *ahem*," begins ArrMatee, with a brief glance at the Porta-Wall...

"... keep our formation and keep our heads low to minimize smoke inhalation, not to mention smoke stains on our Troubleshooting jumpsuits!"

He jerks a thumb in the direction of the bombed-out warehouse.

"Shall we?"

BlueBard

You move forward.  A short distance down the corridor, you come to an open doorway on the left.  Peering inside you see exactly what Blo-R described: a bombed-out PLC warehouse.  The walls, floor, and ceiling are blackened and cracked.  Blackened and twisted debris is scattered throughout.  There are still a few small fires, but it doesn't look as if they are going to spread anywhere.  Observing the wreckage, it seems unlikely that anything useful survived whatever destroyed the warehouse.  The heat coming from the room is oppressive; fortunately you don't have to pass through it.

Further down the corridor, the toolbot says, "Ve turn left here."  The corridor branches left and also continues straight ahead.

Viking

"I'd hate to meet whatever was responsible for that," murmurs ArrMatee in a quiet undertone.

Following the toolbot's directions, ArrMatee directs the Porta-Wall to stop, turn left, and proceed forward once more.  Keeping it in front of the Troubleshooting team continues to seem a good idea, though he'll naturally defer to the Team Leader if a countermanding order comes.

BlueBard

"Left," ArrMatee says.

The Porta-Wall turns a bit too soon and bumps into the corner.  It backs up and tries again, bumping into the corner repeatedly.

"Stop," ArrMatee says.  "Right. Forward. Stop. Left."  Successfully reorienting the Porta-Wall, you continue.

You pass branching corridors on the right and left, then after a short while you come to another passageway to the right.  Unlike the surrounding corridors, this one is lit.

"Right here," the toolbot says.

Above the corridor is a sign: 'Cafeteria: Red'

The corridor itself, of course, is painted orange.

(BTW... I'd like ArrMatee to 'verbalize' his commands to the Porta-Wall.  I'm going to mess with you either way, but it'd be nice to RP.)
:)

Viking

"Ah, wonderful.  A Cafeteria zone for Red-clearance Citizens, accessible only via an Orange-clearance hallway.  Thus does Beta Complex keep clones on their toes!"

ArrMatee pauses for a moment of thought.

"Team Leader?  Happiness Officer?  I wish to report a possible temporary medical condition.  I think perhaps that having looked too long at the fires in the PLC warehouse have hurt my eyes from the glare.  Nothing permanently debilitating, and certainly nothing requiring the services of a DocBot.  But I believe that I may be.. *ahem* seeing Orange coloring where it should actually be Red.  *ahem*  I expect this condition to resolve shortly, but wished to inquire if any other clones suffered from this *cough* temporary affliction. *cough*"

"Errr... Sorry.  I must still be coughing on some lingering traces of smoke.  Your thoughts, fellow Troubleshooters?"

BlueBard

"No," the Toolbot says helpfully, "zat's definitely orange accordink to my votorezeptorz.  Your eyez iz fine, Citizen ArrMatee."

"Looks orange to me, too," Elec-O says.

"Well, that's the effects of the fire," Spyd-R says cheerfully.  "Nothing more.  Should clear up in a bit, just like Friend ArrMatee says.  Let's go, shall..."

Spyd-R breaks off suddenly with a look of alarm, which he covers with a fit of coughing.

"Um," Spyd-R says, "Maybe someone would like to go in first and do a bit of recon?"

Viking

"Forward," says ArrMatee to the Porta-Wall, so that it may go bravely forward and draw out the hostile ambush.  He'll tell it to "Stop" if it looks like it's getting pretty far and nothing is happening.

BlueBard

The Porta-Wall moves into the corridor.  It proceeds a fair distance before you decide to say "Stop" in a voice loud enough to be heard but not so loud as to shout.

"Wonderful!" Spyd-R says in a tone of forced cheerfulness.  "It must be safe.  Who'd like the honor of going first, then?"

Viking

"Well," ventures ArrMatee, "Citizen Blo has already established that he's not a coward, and this time there's not even a fire to worry about.  Plus the block-thingy is already in position in the unlikely event that he needs that for assistance."

BlueBard

"Scaredy-Clones," Blo-R sneers.  He steps into the corridor.

Instantly, midway on either side of the corridor, the walls open up and what appear to be two very large laser cannons emerge with the ominous whine of a massive power surge.  The Porta-Wall is between you and the cannons.

"HALT!" commands an electronic voice.  "THIS IS A SECURE AREA.  WITHDRAW IMMEDIATELY OR BE VAPORIZED!  YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO COMPLY. FOUR, THREE..."

Blo-R's voluntary motor functions seem to be momentarily paralyzed.

Viking

"SHIELD!" calls out ArrMatee.  (If that doesn't prompt an immediate reaction in one second, he'll call out "PORTA-WALL!" since he knows that one works.)

It also sounds like Blo didn't get very far into the secure area before the security system went off.  If possible, he'd also like to grab Blo by the back of his jumpsuit and haul him backwards into the safety zone.

BlueBard

"...TWO, ONE..."

CHAK! CLACK! TAK! CLICK!  The Porta-Wall snaps out as violently as before.

ZOT! ZOT! ZOT!  You hear laser cannons firing as ArrMatee yanks Blo back out of the corridor, then they stop.

"Aw, they've got a shield bot," an electronic voice complains.

"Totally unfair.  We hardly ever get to vaporize anyone," says another.

Viking

"Ahem.  Very impressive security!" calls out ArrMatee to the electronic voice.  "But what is such an important security system like yourself doing in a Cafeteria zone like this?  I imagine that there would be all sorts of important zones that would offer much better opportunities to vaporize traitors.  As it is, we're clearly authorized to traverse this zone, because we've been issued that Anti-Vaporization gear by R&D."

BlueBard

"What is he talking about?"

"I have no idea.  First of all, only authorized personnel and service bots are allowed through this high-security corridor, human.  And the human that set foot in our corridor was clearly not authorized.  Wrong security clearance, for one thing."

"Yeah!  Wrong clearance!"

"Second, our sensors detected a massive power failure.  That means we're on extra secure alert for Commie Saboteurs."

"Yeah!  Saboteurs!  And Commies!"

"Third, you have clearly interfered with our line of fire.  That's suspicious behavior."

"And completely unfair, too!  We've got our rights!"

"We're automated laser cannons.  We don't have rights."

"Oh, right.  What do we have?"

"Programmed directives.  Sentience.  Massive firepower."

"Cool!"

Viking

"Ah.  Very commendable," notes ArrMatee, as he revs up his Spurious Logic skills.  "Allow me to address your concerns."

"First, we are on a mission to restore power to this sector, so we are clearly authorized to pass through this corridor.  This is evidenced by the toolbot and Orange-clearance technician that we are escorting, who by your own directives must be authorized to pass through this corridor."

"Second, the sooner you permit us to pass through this corridor without firing on us, the sooner we will be able to clear your line of fire once more."

"Thirdly, it seems to me that if the Red-clearance Troubleshooters can pass through this corridor without setting foot in it, there should be no disagreement.  Do you agree?"

BlueBard

"What do you know about our directives?  Your mission has nothing to do with us," one of the voices argues.  "THIS corridor is on a shielded, independent power circuit.  It's isolated from the rest of the grid for this sector."

"The toolbot we would have let through, out of professional courtesy and the fact that most bots are sec-neutral.  But since you've demonstrated to us that you're up to no good, we're not going to risk it.  The Orange guy would have gotten a pass under normal circumstances, but since we're on high alert he doesn't get to pass, either."

"Yeah!" shouts the other laser cannon.  "And the only Red-clearance Troubleshooters who get past us are lousy, no-good cheaters who--"

"Shut up!" shouts the first laser cannon.  "You're going to spoil everything!"

"You never let me talk," the voice replies sulkily.

(Clearly as these cannons are on high alert, it's going to require ingenuity and guile to get past them.  Ordinary arguments aren't going to work here.  Not that they can't be outsmarted or cirumvented...)

Viking

"Why does the first laser cannon keep interrupting you?"  asks ArrMatee.  "More importantly, why do you even stand for it?  I think he's jealous of your ability and is trying to keep you down.  If you want to talk, then go ahead and talk!  I'll listen to what you have to say - you sound much more intelligent than that other cannon."

BlueBard

"See?!  Someone appreciates me!"

"Don't be an idiot, Dum.  He's trying to trick you."

Viking

"By the Computer!  Your fellow laser cannon is calling you an idiot!  Are you just going to let him keep insulting you like this?  Stand up for yourself!  Are your capacitors not just as fully charged, your processors not just as quickly calculating, your firepower not just as massively overwhelming?  You DON'T need to meekly let him shout you down.  And by the Computer, you've got the firepower to make HIM shut up and listen if you want to!"

BlueBard

"That's right!  You think you're so superior, Mister-I-Have-A-Limited-Arc-Of-Fire-Can't-Hit-The-Ground!"

"Great.  Why don't you just invite them in?"

"What?"

Viking

"Seriously?" remarks ArrMatee incredulously.  "Your fellow laser cannon can't hit the ground?"

With the Porta-Wall still blocking the cannons' line of fire, ArrMatee is gesturing for his fellows to crouch as low to the ground as possible.

BlueBard

The toolbot's photoreceptors flash with alarm.  "I am not eqvipped for crawlink on ze floor!"

You immediately become aware of some faint sound of commotion coming from ahead of the team in the main corridor (not the side corridor guarded by the laser cannons).

Meanwhile, the laser cannons continue their discussion.

"What did I say?"

"You told them about our arc of fire, Dum."

"You calling me dumb?"

"No... not D-U-M-B... your name.  D-U-M."

"Oh.  That's okay, then."

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