Spaceship Monkey Astral Go!

[Cdub]

Chris: Hi, I'm Chris and this is my "talkshow".......in Japan. Seriously what the hell is up the name? Spaceship Monkey Astral Go? What does that even mean!!!

Producer: I can explain!

*Chris shoots producer with medival crossbow*

Chris: Anyways, while the janitors clean that up, Frank over here will be doing a live commercial.

Frank: If you don't drink Pepsi this is what you become.

Chris: Ok, we have our a great show tonight-

Random Audiance Member: You say that every night!

Chris: Where'd my crossbow go?

*cuts to commercial*

Chris: Ok, tonight we have CHUCK NORRIS ON TONIGHT!!!!

*six audience members' heads blow up*

Chris: Wow, that was random.

Chuck: Oops, I must have done that. There can only be a certain amount awesomeness in one room.

Chris: That can't be right.

*as soon as a janitor walks over the threshold, to clen up the audiense members' blood, his head explodes*

Chris: Whoa! That's awesome! Hey, watch this. GUARDS!!!!!

*sixteen highly trained guards rush into the room, filling it with blood*

Chris: Sweet! Ok, so Chuck-

Chuck: I'd prefer it if you call me either 'The Chuckinator' or 'Lord Norris'.

Chris: Listen Norris, you can't-

*Chris' left arm explodes*

Chuck: Now, let's try this again.

Chris: Ok. *twitch* The Chuckinator....

*Chuck backhands Chris*

Chuck: SHUT UP! I OWN YOU NOW!

Chris: But-

*Chuck hits Chris across the face with a monkey wrench*

Chris: That's all the time *twitch* we have tonight. See you next night! If I'm alive by then!

[Previsionary]

*appears in thread*

:prev: I don't know who you think you are, but this show...it's canned. Rip off someone else's concept. Messin' with me ends with me laughing, you in a grave, and your head somewhere in space.

*sets thread on fire and disappears in a puff of smoke.  A note lands on "Chris's desk"*

P.S. Family Forum...family being the key word. Perhaps you should limit the blood spewing. Also...*explodes*

[Cdub]

Chris: Apparently other shows are trying to shut us down.

*looks at the blood spattered floor and note on his desk*

Chris: So-

*the new producer rushes on stage and whispers in Chris's ear*

Chris PG Show, huh? Ok, then let's start over.

*reruns intro*

Chris: Apparently other shows are trying to shut us down.

*looks at the blood spattered puppies floor and note on his desk*

Chris: That's better. Ok, folks we have a great show tonight AND SWEAR "RANDOM AUDIENCE MEMBER" I'LL REACH DOWN YOUR THROAT PULL OUT YOUR SPLEEN AND MAKE YOU EAT IT IF YOU SAY "YOU SAY THAT EVERY NIGHT!" Lion King, ok?

*the random audience member shoots himself in the head killing him on impact didn't do drugs*

Chris: Ok, we have Alice Cooper on tonight!

*crickets*

Chris: Would someone please hire an extirmanator! This bg problem's gotten out of control!

*cuts to commercial*

Chris:... And then I said die you little- What? We're back on? Ok, here he is, the man no one was waiting for, Alice Cooper!!!!!

Alice: It's great to be here Chris.

Chris: Ok, there's something I've been wanting to ask you... Did you ever get a gay vibe from Dennis Dunaway?

Alice: No.

Chris: Ok, our next guest is Matthew Perry!

Alice: Wait that's the reason you wanted me on the show? Not for me to rock out?

*Chris sprays bug spray taught him how to read*

Chris : Oops, thought he was a cricket!

[Spam]

Chris: That's better. Ok, folks we have a great show tonight AND SWEAR "RANDOM AUDIENCE MEMBER" I'LL REACH DOWN YOUR THROAT PULL OUT YOUR SPLEEN AND MAKE YOU EAT IT IF YOU SAY "YOU SAY THAT EVERY NIGHT!" Lion King, ok?

:spam: "That part did not even make sense... Especially the random "Lion King" there at the end... just a bit awkward..."

[Placebo]

[ow_tiobe_sb]

As the elected leader of this House of Delicate Doilies, I officially declare this studio, its assets, and its products the property of the State, which is, therefore, subject to parliamentary oversight (read "control") effective immediately.  Resistance is futile.  You will be aestheticised.

ow_tiobe_sb
Phantom Bunburyist and Fop o' th' Morning