Paranoia: My Name is Troubleshooter

[BlueBard]

ArrMatee, Spam, and Blo:

[spoiler]It occurs to you that you don't know what 'standard-issue' is for this mission, unless you read the authorization forms.  You might want to avoid requisitioning a lot of junk that you'll have to carry around in addition to whatever you HAVE to take with you.  This helpful tidbit courtesy of your 'Lore: Beta Complex' skill.[/spoiler]

[BlueBard]

Spyd gets in line behind ArrMatee with his own stack of requisition forms.

Just then, an Orange-level clone walks into the PLC outlet, walks right past everyone else in line and inserts himself at the head of the line, ahead of all of the lower security clearance clones.  He turns and glares briefly at everyone behind him, as if daring anyone to comment.

ArrMatee and Spyd are now sixth and seventh in line, respectively.

Meanwhile, Shoot-O's irritation level seems to be climbing.  His scowl deepens, and he keeps glancing at the chronometer and muttering under his breath.

[Spam]

"Hmmm... So I'm the recorder guy... So, wait, what's "standard-issue" for this little training program anyway?"

I will grab any recording devices that I need from ArrMatee, then get in line with some forms and ask about the standard-issue devices that I may or may not need.

[Viking]

ArrMatee-IR-RRR turns around to address his fellow Trainee Troubleshooter Clones:

"Arrr!  I've just had an idea that will help increase our efficiency in this mission!  Once our Standard-Issue Equipment has been dutifully requisitioned, I will need signatures from each of you before I can distribute equipment to you that you will be responsible for!  We can take advantage of our time waiting in line by getting your signatures in advance, thereby saving precious minute-cycles and allowing us to begin our Mission more quickly!"

He smiles brightly at Shoot-O-LOT, trying really hard to look diligent while waiting in line.

[BlueBard]

"Hmmm... So I'm the recorder guy... So, wait, what's "standard-issue" for this little training program anyway?"

I will grab any recording devices that I need from Spyd, then get in line with some forms and ask about the standard-issue devices that I may or may not need.

FYI... Spyd doesn't have any recording devices.  You get in line behind him so you can requisition your own for your Mandatory Bonus Duty.  That makes you eighth in line.

[Spam]

"Sounds like a plan, mr... Uh, did I ever catch your name? It's not something bad, like, Kills-Spam-For-Fun, or something like that... right? Oh, and don't mind me... I'm just this way... I don't know why but, OH MY GOSH, LOOK OUT!"

Spam points to the desk clerk, who is merely doing her job, writing something on a form that one of the troubleshooters gave to her. The only part that Spam saw, was her doing something in a jabbing motion, like her putting her pen down to write on the form. But, it's too late, as Spam is already ducking behind the person in front of him.

[Spam]

OFC: Sorry, I meant ArMatee. But, its too late now. =p

[Viking]

ArrMatee-IR-RRR, without missing a beat, smiles brightly even as Spam-IR-LOT cowers behind Spyd-IR-MAN.

"Arr!  No, Citizen Spam, I am not from FUN Sector.  I am from RRR Sector!  Arr!  Citizen ArrMatee-IR-RRR is my name!  So you don't need to be afraid of me!"

He begins to impatiently tap his foot.  "Come, come, Friend Citizens!  Let's get these forms signed!  An Efficient Citizen is a Happy and Loyal Citizen!  You're all Happy and Loyal Citizens.... aren't you?"

[BlueBard]

"Sounds like a plan, mr... Uh, did I ever catch your name? It's not something bad, like, Kills-Spam-For-Fun, or something like that... right? Oh, and don't mind me... I'm just this way... I don't know why but, OH MY GOSH, LOOK OUT!"

Spam points to the desk clerk, who is merely doing her job, writing something on a form that one of the troubleshooters gave to her. The only part that Spam saw, was her doing something in a jabbing motion, like her putting her pen down to write on the form. But, it's too late, as Spam is already ducking behind the person in front of him.

Spam shouts "OH MY GOSH, LOOK OUT!" while pointing at the clerk and ducking behind Spyd.

This, of course, causes everyone else in the room to flinch.  All three Orange-level citizens whip out various weapons and dive for cover.  This in turn causes the Reds to scatter out of line, leaving ArrMatee, Spyd, and Spam still in line.

ArrMatee calmly makes his address and everyone else glares at Spam.

[BlueBard]

"ONE DEMERIT, YOU LUNATIC!" Shoot-O shouts at Spam.

[Viking]

ArrMatee-IR-RRR will start making his way forward in line, seeing as how so many fellow Citizens have graciously given up their place.  Should an Orange-level citizen assert his place at the front of the line, however, ArrMatee will happily wait for such a Loyal Citizen to continue his business.

"Pay attention, upcoming Troubleshooters!" he calls out to his fellow 'volunteers' for Troubleshooter duty, as he unerringly walks forward.  "Standard Issue Equipment for this Mission shall consist of the following items.  Each member of the team shall be issued:

1 - Red-level jumpsuit
1 - Pair of boots
1 - Laser pistol
1 - Red-level laser barrel
1 - Large backpack
5,000 - Loyalty pamphlets
500 - 'I Love The Computer' buttons

You must sign for this equipment before it will be distributed to you!  Please fill out the appropriate Requisition Forms for any equipment that you believe may be appropriate to your Mandatory Bonus Duty!  Have a pleasant day-cycle, Friend Citizens!"

[BlueBard]

The Orange-level who was in line rushes forward. "Hey!  I was here first!" he proclaims and barges ahead of ArrMatee.

"So were we," one of the Red level Citizens growls.  "INFRA-red," he stresses for emphasis.

[Viking]

The Orange-level who was in line rushes forward. "Hey!  I was here first!" he proclaims and barges ahead of ArrMatee.

"So were we," one of the Red level Citizens growls.  "INFRA-red," he stresses for emphasis.

ArrMatee obligingly steps aside for the Orange-level citizen to pass.

He then looks innocently at the Red Citizen who growled at him.  "I'm sorry, Citizen - I don't know who you are referring to.  I have Red Security Clearance for the purposes of my current mission, as do the fellow Citizens behind me.  Upstanding Citizen Shoot-O-LOT, Security Clearance Orange, is personally overseeing and evaluating this mission," ArrMatee explains, gesturing to the scowling Orange overseer as illustration.

"I merely acted as any Loyal Citizen of Beta Complex would act - I advanced in a line that seemed to have been abandoned, so as not to delay the orderly processing of requisition forms.  I suppose we could ask Citizen Shoot-O-LOT to declare how this line should be reorganized, but I'd much rather not waste his time over such matters."

[BlueBard]

One look at the increasingly agitated Shoot-O, who has NOT yet reholstered his weapons, is enough to help the Reds fall in behind Spam.  The other team members will have to fall in behind them.

"Next," the clerk drones.  The Orange is now being served.

[Spam]

I gradually get up in a stable, standing position, not really looking around to see that everyone is looking at him.

"Sorry everyone... I just don't like standing in lines. Makes me nervous..." I say, sweating.

"Oh, what was it that you wanted, ArMatee? Some signatures, or something to that extent? Anyways, where's the form thingy?"

[Viking]

"Arr!  Of course, Citizen Spam!  Sign right here!  And here.  And... one moment... here as well."

ArrMatee-IR-RRR returns to concentrating on his own paperwork, occasionally looking up expectantly to see if any of his teammates are ready to sign for equipment.

[Viking]

ArrMatee-IR-RRR has a thought, and whispers something down the line to Spam.  Since Spyd is between the two of them, he's probably privy to what is whispered as well.

[spoiler]"Psst!  Hey, Spam - let me know if you need any assistance with those forms for your own requisitions.  Perhaps that would help ease your tensions from standing in line?"[/spoiler]

[gdaybloke]

Spyd nods sagely.

"Good to see you doing your best for the complex, ArrMatee. I'll take some forms, please. My duties with HPD&MC have made me quite adept at form processing, but I'll take any assistance you wish to provide."

Spyd beings signing, initialing, and annotating forms.

[Viking]

ArrMatee mumbles a thanks to Spyd as he proceeds to make his list of requisitions:

One toolbox, with:
A series of of flathead screwdrivers (sized and configured for standard-issue screws Size One Through Six);
One adjustable wrench;
One soldering kit;
One set of wire strippers;
One set of pliers;
One can opener;
One small coil of wire (insulated);
One Geiger counter;
One meter-long power extension cord;
One set of power adapters.

Stated Purpose: As designated Equipment Guy for this mission, I will require the above-listed equipment to perform maintenance on additional equipment requisitioned by my Troubleshooter team, so as to better ensure the return of said equipment at the end of the mission in proper repair.

One suit of Red Reflec Armor

Stated Purpose: All Troubleshooters on this team have been issued Red Security Clearance Laser Pistols and Red Security Laser Barrels.  Proper Safety Protocols require the additional use of Red Reflec Armor to ensure the safety of valuable Computer property, and the safe return of requisitioned equipment at the end of the mission.

[Spam]

Very shakily with the pen, I reach out for the paper, but flinch before signing.

"Are you sure this is... safe? I don't know if I should do this or not... Your not out to get me, are you? Like, in any deadly way are you? Gosh, I feel like this room is getting smaller, is this room getting smaller? Maybe I shouldn't sign... Then they'd know where I would be... Because I signed... That... Thing... Maybe... Uh... I just..."

I stop talking, and stand very still waiting for a response. Even if there isn't a response, I'll stand very still... Because any move could be fatal...

[Panther_Gunn]

"Standard Issue Equipment for this Mission shall consist of the following items.  Each member of the team shall be issued:

1 - Red-level jumpsuit
1 - Pair of boots
1 - Laser pistol
1 - Red-level laser barrel
1 - Large backpack
5,000 - Loyalty pamphlets
500 - 'I Love The Computer' buttons

Blo will get into line (finally). [spoiler]Blo will look over his authorization forms, checking his list with what the Equipment Guy has listed off as mandatory.  [/spoiler]

"Good Friend Citizen ArrMatee, for the purpose of clarification, as the Equipment Guy, will you be requisitioning *everything* our team needs for our training, and then we are to requisition each item in turn from you?  If so, as Hygiene Officer, I request that you requisition a Personal Hygiene Kit and Boot Polish kit for each team member.  Each team member will also require a Thermos, to keep on hand a fresh supply of water to clean with.  I will also require a Multicorder I, to properly capture our team in it's gleaming finest."

Blo proceeds to fill out all appropriate requisition forms for all of the items he's asked for.

[Viking]

ArrMatee-IR-RRR is more than happy to clarify the process to his fellow Troubleshooters-In-Program-Training (TIPT).

"Every team member is responsible for filling out the forms and processing them with a PLC clerk, for each item they deem necessary to fulfill their Mandatory Bonus Duties.  As designated Equipment Guy, my duty is to regularly check any equipment the team is issued or successfully requisitions, to make sure that it remains in proper working order."

"Of course, Citizen Blo, you may note that I said, 'successfully' requisitions.  Such is the wisdom of the Computer, that not everything that we requisition may be automatically issued to us.  Priorities have to be made - ours is not the only Troubleshooting team that serves our Friend, the Computer.  We cannot expect recording equipment to be issued to all of us, if it would deny the use of such recording equipment to higher Security level Troubleshooters.  Hence, it is your responsibility to make your requisitions, as correctly and persuasively as possible, directly with the PLC clerk."

[Spam]

"Well then if we'll be neading all of those extra things, I'll need some extra requisition forms, and some blank forms so I can jot down things... because... I forget things very bad like."

I say, gulping as the line gets shorter.

[BlueBard]

A brief description of the PLC Outlet, for those who are interested:

This room is essentially the front office for a warehouse, but there is no direct access to that.  Behind the counter and behind the clerk is a door that leads back into the warehouse area.

However, this is also a sort of convenience store and some of the less valuable goods are on display in this room.  Lots of bouncy bubble, lots of cruncheetyme algae chips, and assorted other items.

[BlueBard]

The Clerk takes the Orange-level citizen's paperwork with her into the back room.  This citizen taps his foot impatiently waiting for his requisition to be filled.

[The Phantom Eyebrow]

* Numb-IR-one continues holding his place further back in the queue.  Being a part of this singular, orderly arrangements seems to be suit him and he is at his ease.  The thoughts of the exciting missions ahead and the cool free stuff he can requistition from the Computer seem to further gladden him.  The only potential concern he might have is the agitated state of Spam-R-lot further up ahead in the queue but he can see that some of the other loyal citizens seem to be calming him down. *

* Ah yes, life is good. *

[BlueBard]

* Numb-IR-one continues holding his place further back in the queue.  Being a part of this singular, orderly arrangements seems to be suit him and he is at his ease.  The thoughts of the exciting missions ahead and the cool free stuff he can requistition from the Computer seem to further gladden him.  The only potential concern he might have is the agitated state of Spam-R-lot further up ahead in the queue but he can see that some of the other loyal citizens seem to be calming him down. *

* Ah yes, life is good. *

The clerk finally reappears and shoves a box at the Orange-level.  "Next!" she cries.

Numb:
[spoiler]It suddenly occurs to you that you are in line behind the Reds and that makes you EIGHTH in line!  Horrors![/spoiler]

ArrMatee, you're up.  Do you just shove the paperwork at the clerk, or do you attempt to interact with her?

[gdaybloke]

SPyd calmly waits his turn, occasionally tweaking his arm hairs and humming a Bouncy Bubble Beverage jingle.

[Viking]

ArrMatee attempts some basic friendly interaction with the clerk.

"Greetings, Citizen," he says casually.  "Another exciting daycycle working the desks at PLC, isn't it?"

The last line is given with a knowing sardonic grin.

"Anyways - here's the forms for the Standard-Issue Equipment authorized for my team by Citizen Watch-Y-BAK.  These other forms are my own Requisitions.  But I tell you what - if you help speed my Requisitions through processing, I'll give you a Happiness Energy Bar to make your day even better.  Good for us all to have that extra bit of Happiness as we serve the Computer, arr?"

[BlueBard]

ArrMatee attempts some basic friendly interaction with the clerk.

"Greetings, Citizen," he says casually.  "Another exciting daycycle working the desks at PLC, isn't it?"

The last line is given with a knowing sardonic grin.

"Anyways - here's the forms for the Standard-Issue Equipment authorized for my team by Citizen Watch-Y-BAK.  These other forms are my own Requisitions.  But I tell you what - if you help speed my Requisitions through processing, I'll give you a Happiness Energy Bar to make your day even better.  Good for us all to have that extra bit of Happiness as we serve the Computer, arr?"

The clerk favors you with a look of utter boredom.

"Gee.  What a big spender!  Gosh, where else could I find a Happiness Energy Bar?  Aside from the five-thousand units in crates in the warehouse, that is."

The clerk looks over the forms for your mission issue.  Her eyes narrow.  "That's a lot of stuff."  She continues reading, then sighs.  "The paperwork's in order, though.  Wait here."  She motions over her supervisor.  "Mission team in with a big order.  Can you watch the counter for me?"  Then she disappears into the back room.

The Orange PLC supervisor steps behind the counter and says, "I see you have some additional requisition forms.  Let me have a look at them, hmmm?"  He starts going through the rest of your requisitions.