Best of the worst - Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest 2010

[Glitch Girl]

http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/

The results are on once again.  Revel in it, revel I say!

Personally, I like the runner up better than the winner...

Through the verdant plains of North Umbria walked Waylon Ogglethorpe and, as he walked, the clouds whispered his name, the birds of the air sang his praises, and the beasts of the fields from smallest to greatest said, "There goes the most noble among men" -- in other words, a typical stroll for a schizophrenic ventriloquist with delusions of grandeur.

[BlueBard]

Oh there were a lot of good bad ones in this bunch!  I liked the runner-up, too.

I also particularly liked, in no particular order:

Both the winner and runner-up in the Detective category,

The winner in the Historical Fiction category, and

The winner in the Vile Puns category.

It took me a painfully long time to get this one until I sounded it out:

As Jeffrey Hicks, the event safety coordinator for the Renaissance Festival finished posting the revised standards for weaponry, he thought of the day an unleashed dog wandered onto the jousting field, causing the rider from Indianapolis to stop short, impaling himself on the butt of his spear, and the following day?s newspaper headline which read: ?Stray Injures Indy Knight, Hicks Changing Lances.?

Spoiler

Strangers in the night, exchanging glances

Thus making it the most obscure yet cleverest entry in the whole lot.  But it wasn't my favorite.

Ye gads, I need to enter this thing sometime.  Thanks for keeping us informed, GG!

[Tawodi Osdi]

I've been doing too much Facebook lately.  I wanted to hit the "Like" button.  Anyway, this is pretty cool and funny.  It would be tough to pick a favorite, but I do like the fact the two fellow Okies made the roster.  Go Sooners!  If this is annual, I might try and sign up for next year.